Alright, y'all — I'm back on the pop tart train. All aboard! And they just keep getting more ridiculous than the next. There's nothing better than combining two insanely sugary 90s snack foods into one — let's call it a "pastry" — that we will somehow pass off as a breakfast food.
Is there a person that didn't have a love affair with Circus Animal cookies as a child? They're probably banned in Europe for being too appealing to children and simultaneously being terrible for you, like flavored cigarettes. But how can you hate a neon pink animal-shaped cracker covered in plasticky frosting and doused with colorful sprinkles? You can't. You can't hate it.
So, naturally, I made Circus Animal pop tarts, because I can, that's why. I don't turn down an opportunity to make a pink carb full of sprinkles when it pops into my brain. And now that you've seen this, you can't look away, like a circus clown car accident, and you're going to want to make them, too. My work here is done.
makes 8 pop tarts
for the pop tarts
- 3 pie crusts (storebought is great! or we like this, too)
- 8 oz. cream cheese, softened
- 1/2 cup powdered sugar
- 1 T nonpariel sprinkles
- 15 crushed Circus Animal cookies
- Few drops pink food coloring (optional)
- 1 egg
for the topping
- 1 cup powdered sugar
- 1/4 tsp vanilla
- 1-2 T of milk
- excessive amounts of nonpareil sprinkles
- pink food coloring
- Preheat oven to 350F/180C. Lay out pie crusts (roll until thin if you made them yourself) and cut them into rectangles – remember you'll need two rectangles for each tart. Place each rectangle on a cookie sheet covered in parchment paper.
- In a medium-sized bowl, combine cream cheese, powdered sugar and cookies. Add sprinkles and food coloring to your liking (though you should get a bit of pink coloring from the cookies).
- In a small bowl, whisk egg with 1 tablespoon of water. Lightly brush egg wash onto half of the pastry rectangles.
- Dollop 3-4 tablespoons of the cream cheese mixture onto the egg washed-pastries until half of the rectangles are covered. Don't worry — the filling remains fairly thick and won't leak or expand.
- Brush the egg wash onto the remaining pastry rectangles and place them egg wash-side down on top of the cream cheese mixture.
- Crimp the sides of the tarts with a fork to seal the edges. With a toothpick or a fork, poke holes in the top of the tart to vent. You won't see these holes in the end.
- Place the pop tarts in the oven and cook for 20-25 minutes or until golden brown. Set out to cool completely.
- Once pop tarts have cooled, mix powdered sugar, vanilla and milk for the topping (start with one tablespoon of milk and add more as needed — it should be thicker). Add food coloring to the coloring to your liking, and then dollop and spread onto the pop tarts. While still wet, top with sprinkles. Let set for 15-20 minutes until the frosting is hard, then enjoy!
Photos and text © Katie Currid, 2015. All rights reserved.